Love Song Requiem
by Lucy Maria Elmer
Summary: Connie wants to get to know Diane better and so invites her ice skating one Christmas Eve  femmeslash fic


Love Song Requiem.

(I own nothing. I'm just playing with the characters for a little while)

Diane walked over to the car on which the other woman leant, snowflakes catching in her curls as she stood bouncing on the spot, trying to keep warm as the snow fell heavily around her. She was dressed in a thick winter coat, with white gloves and a white scarf wrapped around her that made her look like an angel when Diane noted the contrast between their stark whiteness and the redness of Connie's cold cheeks. She had always thought Connie was beautiful, but seeing her stood there with the white snow glistening in wet droplets on her curls, and those beautiful rosy cheeks bringing out the colour of her eyes, made the breath catch in Diane's throat and her heart skip a beat. If beauty had a name, for Diane, it would be Connie Beauchamp.

Connie smiled as Diane reached her, taking in the sight of the rosy cheeks of the young blonde woman and the piercing eyes that seemed to be studying her every feature. Diane gave her a wary smile, which Connie couldn't really blame her for the time that she had invited her on this Christmas Eve outing was the first time she had ever asked to spend time with the shy woman outside of work on a less than formal basis. Diane's lips were chattering with the cold and her hair cascaded in snow filled waves down past her shoulders. The top of her head was covered with a sequined black beret that sparkled under the streetlamps which were glowing like beacons against the snow filled white sky. Connie had never seen her looking more beautiful and was glad that today she had her all to herself.

"Hi." Diane said shyly, studying Connie's car. "Where is everybody?" she then asked shivering, joining Connie in hopping from leg to leg as they stood outside in the snow filled air.

Connie blushed.

"I think the snow was too much for them. I don't think they wanted to risk ice skating in low visibility conditions." Connie joked, smiling in response to the warm smile that appeared on Diane's lips.

"They probably had more sense than I did." Diane commented looking at the sky. "It's really coming down."

Connie looked up to the sky too, wanting so badly to admit that she hadn't actually invited anybody else to ice skate, only Diane, because when it came down to it Diane was the one person that she wanted to get to know better, without her other colleagues getting in the way. She'd told Diane she'd invited others, she'd been fearful of how the other woman would react if she were to admit that a group outing was all a facade to be given a chance to spend time with the one woman she considered to be so much of a mystery. Uncharted and beautiful territory that Connie wanted to explore and begin to get to know. Now it was snowing and it looked as though the whole outing would be over before it had even began.

"Would you rather go home? I'd completely understand seeing as we're alone and it's freezing and heading towards a white out." Connie told Diane smiling, rubbing her gloved hands up and down her jacket as she tried to keep herself warm.

Diane looked at her a little disappointed. She shook her head.

"The snow kind of makes it all seem a little bit more Christmassy don't you think? As long as you promise to drive carefully with this precious cargo then I say we give the ice skating a try. If it gets too much we can always find some coffee and wait until the heavens have stopped opening on Holby." Diane told her and Connie grinned.

"Sounds like a plan to me. Shall we?" Connie asked, motioning towards the car. "I fear that we're both going to turn into icicles if we don't get into the warm any time soon. As much as I adore the snow we'll have plenty of exposure to it in a little while don't you think?"

Diane nodded, smiling as Connie opened the passenger door for her. She climbed into the car, giggling as she watched Connie trying to walk as carefully as she could on the slippery pavement, gasping as she suddenly slid and disappeared from view.

Diane quickly climbed back out of the car and ran around the front of it, to be greeted with the sight of Connie splayed on the pavement. The woman started giggling as soon as she saw Diane's shocked face and within seconds both of them were laughing.

"So much for being graceful." Connie muttered, trying to push herself up off the slippery pavement and failing miserably.

"I'm going to be doing my fair share of that while ice skating so I wouldn't worry. I'm hardly graceful at the best of times." Diane replied, offering a gloved hand to the blushing woman on the ground.

Connie gently took hold of Diane's hand, allowing the woman with such piercing eyes to help pick her up from her prone position on the snow. She shivered as she found herself back on her feet, her face so close to Diane's that she could feel her warm breath against her cold skin and almost imagine how her lips would feel against hers. She could feel goose bumps on her arms which she knew were nothing to do with the cold winter's air and suddenly felt self conscious.

"Are you okay? Did you bang your head?" Diane asked, placing her fingers gently on Connie's curls to feel for a bump.

"I uh..." Connie hesitated at Diane's gentle touch. She placed her fingers on top of her concerned colleagues, entwining her fingers in hers. "No I'm fine honestly. It's just a case of wounded pride." Connie reassured, moving Diane's fingers away from her wet curls and down to her side where their fingers stayed entwined for a little longer than they should have.

Diane looked down at their hands and blushed.

"We should..."

Diane motioned to the car, shivering slightly.

"Right. Yes we should." Connie agreed.

"Then we should probably." Diane commented, looking at their hands.

"Yes. Um...shall we..."

The two quickly let go of each other's hands, making their way to the car carefully and climbing inside.

"You're sure you're okay?" Diane asked with concern as Connie started the engine. She was fiddling with a strand of loose cotton on her glove and Connie  
couldn't help but feel endeared to the woman who sat at her side, her eyes shining and her blonde waves covered in snow.

"I'm fine. Really." Connie reassured with a smile.

Diane nodded, seeming placated by Connie's reassurance.

"Why did you ask me to come?" Diane then suddenly asked, her piercing eyes looking straight into Connies.

Connie froze.

"I mean we've never really spoken before. We never made the effort to get to know each other. Was asking me some afterthought because you didn't want to hurt me by inviting everyone else and not me?"

Connie looked at the floor, hurt that Diane had such low self esteem that she would think that she was merely an afterthought and also hurt that Diane would think that of her.

"No of course not." Connie replied, reversing out of her space and making her way out of the car park. "I just thought...it's silly." She then added, unable to meet Diane's eyes.

"What's silly?"

Connie took a deep breath wondering whether she should tell the truth.

"Diane I didn't even invite anyone else. I wanted to get to know you and just you. So as you can see you were certainly not an afterthought. You were the only thought that I had."

Both sat in silence as Connie drove. Connie occasionally glancing at Diane so she could gauge her emotions but Diane was giving none away. Instead she was just staring straight ahead of her, showing no reaction at all.

"Why?" She then whispered softly, looking down at the hands that rested on her lap.

"Why not?" Connie replied. "Do you have any idea how beautiful you are? Or how sweet? You can't see the person you are. You can't see what other people do. I wanted to see more of that."

Diane blushed, her eyes turning to the window, looking out at the snowy landscape that whizzed past them.

"I uh. I don't know what to say." Diane responded with an uncomfortable laugh. "No-one's ever said anything like that about me before. Why would you want to see more? You of all people?"

"Of all people?" Connie asked her.

"You're Connie Beauchamp. The Connie Beauchamp. You could have anyone you wanted. Everyone respects you. I'm...Diane Lloyd."

Connie looked at Diane carefully and saw tears in her eyes. She pulled the car over and stopped the engine, undoing her seatbelt and shifting so that she was facing Diane properly.

"And you think there's something wrong with that?" Connie asked softly, using her fingers to tilt Diane's chin so that their eyes met.

"You have Grace. You have men falling at your feet. I have a husband who left me, no children...no one wants me and at Christmas...I can't even bring myself to go to my parents."

"How do you know that no-one wants you?" Connie asked, reaching a trembling hand out to Diane's cheek and cupping it with her palm. She stroked the skin gently with her thumb.

"Connie...you...like men...don't you?" Diane asked softly. "I'm not sure what this is..."

"I like you." Connie whispered, leaning into Diane and kissing her softly on the lips. "Because you're sweet, and you're beautiful, and you're caring. You need someone Diane. I want to be that person." Connie whispered into her ear, starting up the car again and pulling away, giving Diane time to mull over her words.

As Connie drove Diane watched her intently. She studied Connie's fearful expression, the way that her face looked from the side, the pinkness of her flushed cheeks. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw a tear fall from the other woman's eyes, Connie now so afraid that she had messed things up.

Diane placed a hand over Connie's on the steering wheel.

"I don't understand. What about Sam? And your husband?"

"I've always felt like something was missing. With both of them. Sam gave me Grace and for that I will always care for him a great deal. Then there you were, and when I thought about wanting to get to know you, when I looked at you or spoke to you and my heart skipped a beat and I found myself with butterflies in my stomach...I knew that the missing thing wasn't male. It wasn't anyone else. It was you."

"Connie I haven't been with a woman since...medical school and that was a complete mess. I had no idea that you felt the way that you did about me."

"And why would you? I never showed you. It's partly why I arranged today. I wanted to see if what I felt was real. I wanted to see if you were who I thought you were."

"And am I?" Diane asked softly.

Connie pulled into the ice skating rink car park, parked the car and shut off the engine. She turned to Diane.

"You're even more than that." She admitted, taking in every detail of Diane's face from her sparkling blue eyes to her flushed cheeks and hair that was wet with snow. "Shall we?" She asked, motioning towards the outdoor rink.

Diane nodded, quiet and thoughtful as she climbed out of the car and she and Connie made their way to get their skates.

Within minutes the pair were on the ice. Connie immediately skated away gracefully, the snow falling around her making her appear almost ethereal as she spun. Diane meanwhile found herself flailing and within minutes had fallen in a heap onto the ice.

Connie immediately skated over to her and couldn't help but giggle at the furious blush that had appeared on the young woman's face.

"I told you this would happen a lot." Diane responded, Connie's giggling proving infectious. "Stop laughing and help me." She mock scolded through the giggles, trying to push herself up from the ice but failing miserably and finding herself sliding a little across the icy ground.

Connie reached out a hand, and still shaking with laughter tried her hardest to pull the extremely embarrassed Diane up. Connie's cheeks went rosy as she struggled furiously but Diane wouldn't budge which made the pair almost hysterical. When she did manage to get up she promptly spun on her feet and fell back down again, burying her face in her gloved hands with shame.

"I will never be the epitome of grace." Diane muttered shyly, as Connie leant over and tried to get her up off the cold ice by supporting her back. She could feel Diane shiver against her touch. "You're never going to want to be seen out in public with me again." She added, taking in the eyes of all the spectators who had gathered to watch, the snow now falling heavily again around them.

"Don't be silly." Connie replied, stroking stray curls from Diane's striking eyes. "Does that mean you'd like us to do something again?"

"Very much." Diane whispered softly, her eyes falling to her feet. "If we ever manage to get me up off this ice."

Connie struggled for a few more seconds but some other skaters took pity, coming over and helping to get Diane back on her feet again.

"You might want to keep hold of her." A young man commented, smiling warmly at the pair as he skated off. They both blushed. There was nothing neither wanted to do more.

Connie offered her hand to Diane, who shyly took it.

"Let's see if I can keep you upright." Connie teased, firmly keeping hold of the woman at her side as they skated around the ice rink.

"It all looks so much better when you're standing up."

Connie smiled, the look of happiness on Diane's face warming her heart.

"You know you could spend Christmas with Grace and I if you wanted. There's always room for you at ours. Grace will adore you." Connie commented, not daring to look at Diane, instead keeping her eyes straight ahead of her.

"I wouldn't want to get in your way. Christmas is time for families. Grace is your family."

"I'd like you to be part of my family. Maybe one day at least." Connie explained.

Diane looked at the ground and Connie blushed. Diane wobbled on her feet and Connie did the best that she could to keep her upright and skating instead of having her fall onto the ice and bruise herself even more.

"Sorry. I'm coming on a bit strong I know." She admitted. "I know that you said that you've only been with a woman once before and I haven't really. There was a drunken kiss once but I haven't felt anything for a woman before like I feel for you. I don't mean to make you feel like you have to do anything."

"You're not." Diane replied shaking her head. "It's just one day I'm admiring you from afar and the next I find out that you've been admiring me too."  
Connie stopped suddenly, Diane spinning and falling onto the ice with Connie strategically falling on top of her.

"You've been admiring me?" Connie asked, a smile creeping onto her face.

Diane smiled.

"Who wouldn't? Look at you." She replied bravely, brushing Connie's fringe from her eyes. "But aren't you worried about Grace? If we tried and we were to work...aren't you worried about what people may think or say?"

Connie shook her head.

"Grace has her father Diane and he adores her. What's wrong with her having two mothers instead of one? As long as she's loved and knows that she's loved by all of us that's all that matters. Anything else we deal with as a family...if we were to get involved and if we were to work out of course. But I want you to know that I'd never want you to try if you didn't want to or if you weren't ready."

Diane looked at Connie carefully, so touched by the fierce protectiveness Connie showed for her daughter and by the obvious amount of thought that had gone into pursuing a relationship which would have implications for all involved. Connie obviously knew it wouldn't be easy but still she was prepared to give it a try and to make it work even if it meant an unconventional and yet loving family for her daughter.

"So what do you say? Would you like to spend Christmas with Grace and I?" Connie asked; both women completely unaware of all of the people who had stopped to look at the scene folding in front of them, the two women oblivious to anyone but each other and still tangled up on the ice.

"What if you change your mind? You said you'd never had a relationship with a woman before. What if it's all too much and I give you everything and you decide you don't want me. It happens to me a lot." Diane responded tearfully.

"I don't think I could ever knowingly hurt you." Connie replied, cupping Diane's cold cheeks in her palms. "Please spend Christmas with us?" She asked again softly.

"I'd love to." Diane replied. She ran her gloved fingertips over the contours of Connie's cheeks, then placed a hand on the back of Connie's head and gently pulled Connie's lips to hers. She then kissed her, gently yet passionately, allowing all of the emotion that she felt for the woman whose body was entwined in hers in the snow to be focused on that one lingering kiss. "Maybe next Christmas too, and the rest, if we're lucky." Diane whispered into Connie's ear as she breathlessly pulled away from her.

"I think we can do this." Connie replied, stroking Diane's cheek with her thumb.

"I think we can too." Diane replied with a small nod, placing her hand on top of Connie's and squeezing it. "You do realise that everybody here just saw our first proper kiss?" She then asked with a small blush.

Connie looked at the people around them, some talking, some whispering, others smiling. She found herself not caring what they thought for all she could think about was the woman whose body was pressed up against hers.

"Well then, they won't be shocked if we share another. Merry Christmas Diane." Connie whispered into her ear, trailing kisses up Diane's neck, behind her ear, and then kissing her softly on the lips.

"Merry Christmas." Diane whispered breathlessly as her lips then found Connie's again. "Ice skating was the best idea I think you could have had." She added afterwards, running her fingers through Connie's curls and then over her cheeks as they flushed.

Connie nodded.

"I think you're right." She agreed as the crowd around them erupted into claps and wolf whistles, the two women giggling as the snow fell around them and the day proving to be the most romantic and eventful Christmas Eve they could have wished for, except of course for their Christmas Eve wedding two years later.


End file.
